dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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