guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
