Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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