I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Come on in and take your pants off
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