if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
