so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
