Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Randomize
