She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Randomize