I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
