I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
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