if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Randomize