addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Randomize