i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Randomize
