How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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