apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
And then he peed in my hair
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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