Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
how drunk are you?
Several
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize