Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
