Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
