Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
