I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
