Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
you win again, gameday.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
