I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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