you guys were way drunker than both of me
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Randomize
