He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I want to make a zoo with you.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
