this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Randomize
