so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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