I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
