google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
