He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
