I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
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