you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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