i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
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