This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
Randomize