Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
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