I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
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