a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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