I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Randomize
