i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
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