She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Randomize
