You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Randomize
