remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
