Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
