i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
How's work?
Spinning.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
