My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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