i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize