I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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