At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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