So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize
