im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
