i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Randomize
