And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
